A Beginning
by jesterdragon46
Summary: My Omake file, chock full half baked ideas, random scenes and assorted stuff. Most will be up for grabs. Not all will be Ranma. Got a Harry Potter or two in here as well.
1. A Beginning

Authors Note: Not sure where I'm going with this, but it got stuck in my head so I decided to write it out. It's the beginning and if you want to continue it, let me know.

Disclaimer: Yes. It's true. I own Ranma ½, for I am Takahashi! What's that you say? Takahashi is an older Japanese woman and I'm a young American boy? Yeah, I know. Ya see, I fell in the spring of drowned manga creator... not buyin' that, eh. Well bullocks.

New news is good news! - This one shot has been folded into To Become a God. I liked the concept and where it goes, so I'm using it.

**The Setup**

Ranma walked along a fence in Nerima, caught up in is own thoughts. Why was his life so damn complicated and chaotic. What was it that made it like that. Well, there were the people, involved with him, and the bonds of law and honor of course. But why must it be this way.

First there was his mother, Nodoka. A traditional Japanese woman who seemed to lack common sense and sanity. To start with, she had married his father, Genma. Then she had allowed Genma to take her only son away at a young age and accepted a seppuku contract in his place to make him a "man amongst men". Sadly her idea of a manly man was a pervert.

Then there was Genma. Fat, lazy bastard had dragged Ranma off on a ten year training journey that, while effective, was more a ten year torture trip. Fighting his own father for food, running from wolves with all there possessions as well as his father on his back, tied to the back of a moving train, thrown off cliff faces to learn how to fall, sold off as a fiance to feed his fathers stomach more times than he could count, neko-ken, curse. Most of Ranma's own problems could be traced back to the fat panda.

The Fiance Brigade. Ukyo, Shampoo, and Akane. Ukyo had been his best childhood friend, even if he had thought she was a boy at the time. Genma had stolen her dowry and ditched her on the side of the road. She had been stripped of her femininity and forced to live as a boy by her father. Honor demanded she either kill him and Genma, marry him, or be cast out of her family a ronin.

Shampoo was his own fault. He should have made Genma fight his own challenge after he'd eaten the prize for the tournament at the amazon village. Instead he'd battled shampoo, in his cursed form, and won. By the law of her village she swore to hunt Ranma-chan to the ends of the world and kill her. Then he'd defeated her by accident as a guy, and by law she had to marry him. He was responsible for her getting cursed to turn into a c-c-c... those things that chase mice. That wouldn't be so bad, but the nut bar had actually fallen in love with him.

Akane was a different kettle of fish. She hated him. He thought once that he had loved her. He'd killed a freaking GOD for her. But did it matter. Hell no. she treated him like shit. Unfortunately, family honor demanded he marry the abusive twit. A promise to join the schools made between Soun and Genma before either had been born.

Then there were the rivals. Oh yes, can't forget the bloody rivals. Moose, an amazon male who's only ambition in life was to kill Ranma and take Shampoo as his wife. Lets forget that Shampoo hates him as much as Akane hates Ranma. The blind hidden weapons master believed that if he killed Ranma, Shampoo would proclaim her love for him.

Ryoga, the eternally lost boy. Cursed to turn into Akane's pet piglet. Everything that went wrong in his life was, naturally, Ranma's fault. He wanted Akane. He could have her for all Ranma cared. She treated him better anyway, in cursed form or not.

Then there was the delusional Tatewaki Kuno...

"Hold Varlet!"

Ah! Speak of the devil. Ranma ceased his increasingly angry introspection.

"Come then, foul sorcerer, I the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High shall save the tigress Akane Tendo, and the Pig-Tailed Goddess from your Vile clutches! Have at thee!"

Ranma flipped lazily over the kendoists initial attack and prepared to put him down, again, when suddenly he had a idea. It was so crazy it might just work.

"Ah! sempi, at last I've found you! I require help that only one as noble and powerful as you can give!" Ranma shouted in his best Kunoese. Kuno stopped dead in his tracks, stupefied.

"Huh?"

"Indeed! Listen closely sempi, for I do not know how much time I have. I have been placed under an enchantment to make me behave as the beast you thought me to be. The true foul sorcerer is none other than Genma Saotome!"

"Ha! That I would believe such lies." Kuno scoffed.

"But it is true Lord Kuno!" Ranma kicked it up a notch, "The demon sought gain himself a dojo from Soun Tendo by forcing the fierce tigress Akane and this unworthy one to wed against our will. When I refused, he placed a most horrible enchantment on me to force my pursuit of her."

"But what of the pig-tailed girl? Why do you hold her in your clutches?"

Ranma smirked to himself inwardly. The fool was listening. "My twin sister! Alas, for it is a most horrible story!"

"Twin Sister!" Kuno shouted in shock

"Indeed! I broke his enchantment upon me most recently and he restored it by sacrificing my beloved twin sister."

"Sacrifice! The Pig-Tailed Goddess!" Tatewaki exclaimed in a rage.

"He sealed away her soul and imprisoned her form within my own. It can now only be viewed when I am hit with cold water. I can prove it to you." Ranma exclaimed. This was the tricky part. "I require your help to save us all. We need to break the enchantments on myself and the rest of the Tendo household, as well as separate my sisters body from my own and recover her very soul!"

Tatewaki gazed at Ranma speculatively. "Such a story is impossible to accept..."

"I can prove it to you sempi. Just give me a chance!" Ranma pleaded with what he hoped sounded a desperate voice.

"I will allow you to try, but I warn you Saotome, if you are lying..."

"Please, you must save my sister the Pig-tailed Girl!" Ranma hopped the fence and walked up to the canal on the other side. Kuno followed. "Watch closely sempi." Ranma stepped into the water and changed into his cursed form.

"Pig-Tailed Girl!" Kuno exclaimed

"Alas no, sempi. Merely her body for the Foul Sorcerer, Genma Saotome, has done this. I may return to my own body with warm water." Ranma pulled a thermos out of stuff space and poured it over her head after stepping out of the canal, instantly reverting to his male form. "Only you can save us from this evil spell so that she may shower her affection upon you." Please let it work prayed Ranma

"This is so... it cannot be..." Kuno looked gob smacked. Ranma had him, hook, line, and sinker. Now to cap the performance.

"AAAARGH!" Ranma clutched at his head, falling to his knees. "The spell! I can not fight it much longer!" he started bringing up his battle aura, then pushing it down so that a blue light seemed to flicker about his body. "Sempi! You must break Genma's spell! But beware, for he is a sneaky evil, and will use others to shield himself. The foul sorcerer can change his form to that of a large pandaAAAAHHH!" He brought his aura up to the visible spectrum, ringing himself in blue light, "I can hold it back no more! Please Lord Kuno!" suddenly Ranma flared his aura out a foot from his body and blanked his face, then drew his aura back into himself before looking up at Kuno with his trademark smirk.

"So young Saotome thinks to get help in his plight does he." Ranma said in his best evil voice. "Well it won't work. Master Genma will prevail." With that Ranma launched himself at Kuno and pummeled him into unconsciousness. Hope that worked he thought as he walked away, a spring in his step.


	2. Awakened Desires

Disclaimer – I don't own Ranma 1/2, or Rurouni Kenshin. I do, however, own Rumiko Takahashi and Mangaka Nobuhiro Watsuki. I bought their souls on E-Bay for 20 bucks each.

Authors Note Kasumi doing the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. Nuff said.

The Idea – Ranma and a few others see a palm reader at a local festival. The reader tells them a few things about their past lives, but this is Nerima, and everything here tends toward the crazy. They start to have weird dreams of the past lives she told them about, and gradually start showing some of the abilities from their past life. In the scenes below I have Ranma with Inu-Yasha, Kasumi with Kenshin Himura (past live need not actually be the same sex, or limited to one character really), and Nabiki referencing Merrill from Rune Soldier.

**Awakened Desires**

Ranma ducked into the brightly colored tent to avoid the NWC. He never expected the fortune teller to offer a free reading of his past lives. The price was right. With a shrug he had a seat across from the withered old woman.

"Such a long life line. You have many past lives." the old crone cackled. Ranma wasn't so sure about her. Seventeen wasn't really a long life, unless she meant he'd survived enough near death experiences to fill a long life.

"I see your past, as clearly as I can see you, young man. Yes!" She studied his palm carefully. "I see a girl, your soul mate. With long dark hair... and the powers of a miko."

"I don't need no more fiances." he almost pulled his hand back, but the crone held on.

"In your past, I see a sword..."

"Maybe in my future." Ranma muttered, thinking of his mother and that damn seppuku pledge.

"I see a demonic presence."

"Happosai." he said under his breath.

"And many rivals, and battles."

"So you see last Tuesday. Great. Thanks." Ranma grouched, getting up and walking out.

* * *

"Hiten Mitsurugi Style Lightning Umbrella!"

The rapidly spinning umbrella deflected all six kunai thrown by the surprised ninja. His gaze snapped up from the simple tool to the woman who owned it. She was quite pretty, with long brown hair bound in a ponytail pulled over her shoulder. She wore a simple dress and had quite a cheerful look to her.

"Oh my, those could have hurt someone Mr. Ninja, that they could." The girl said in gentle admonishment. The ninjas left eye twitched. Better not to say anything, yes, best to attack when faced with such a deceptive opponent. The ninja drew his ninja-to and thrust at his calm opponent.

"Hiten Mitsurugi Style Dodge the Big Boar!" The cute girl shouted, Dodging his charge and whacking him in the back with her now closed umbrella. The ninja staggered forward off balance for a moment before spinning around to face... nothing.

"Hiten Mitsurugi Style Umbrella Smash!" The ninja looked up just in time to take the umbrella full force to the face as the girl descended.

"Oh my, poor Mr. Ninja." the girl said, one hand to her mouth as she gazed at her swirly eyed attacker. "You'll catch a cold if you keep lying in that puddle, that you will."

The ninja suddenly sat strait up, shaking his head violently.

"W-What happened?"

"I'm afraid you took a nasty hit Mr. Ninja. Why were you attacking me, if I may ask?" The girl said, helping the ninja to stand.

"Um... yeah... sorry about that miss..."

"Kasumi Tendo."

"Miss Tendo. I was just a little short of this months car insurance payment, and I _am_ a ninja, so..."

"So you thought that you'd mug some one." The girl finished for him. "That's not very nice Mr. Ninja, that it's not." the girl frowned. For some reason the ninja couldn't help but want to do anything to avoid that frown. He hadn't felt that way since the last time he had seen his dear mother.

"Awww, c'mon Miss Tendo! I'm a ninja! Attack from shadows and all that! If you think I'm a crook, you should see my insurance company's rates!"

The girl seemed to think about that for a moment before turning a smile at the ninja. "Have you tried switching to Geico?"

The ninja faceplanted.

* * *

"Shi Shi Hokodan!" Ranma slammed into a wall, spider webbing it in cracks from the impact. He was bruised, bleeding, and very, very angry. Ryoga rushed forward to continue his assault, but suddenly stopped when Ranma's eyes flashed a demonic red. His hand reached up, pressing against one of his many cuts before striking out in a flash of movement, flinging blood at Ryoga.

"Blades of Blood!" he growled out in a shout. The Ki infused blood whipped at Ryoga like a series of blades. He was so shocked he almost forgot to dodge. He totally missed it when Ranma leaped into the air, coming down as if to claw him with his hand.

"Iron Reaver Soul Stealer!" Ryoga watched as a set of golden claws composed entirely of Ki shredded his forearms, hastily erected across his chest to block. Looking at his bloodied arms, Ryoga realized that Ranma was out for blood. He was fighting with lethal intent, not like he usually did. Ryoga smiled

"This is more like it! Now I'll kill you and nobody will be able to deny you deserved it!" Ryoga whipped off his belt and infused it with Ki, stiffening it into a leather sword. "Die!" he shouted, charging at his enemy.

* * *

"My Darling Jar!" Nabiki screamed out, bolting up right in her bed, flinging cold sweat with the force of that action. Now awake she took deliberate deep breaths to get her heart under control. _What the hell was that all about?_


	3. Harry Potter and the LazEBoy of Doom

**Harry Potter and the Laz-E-Boy of Doom**

Disclaimer – where I say I don't own nuthin

Authors Note = brief note before the show

General Idea - Harry steals Voldemorts chair. Dumbledore wants it, but Harry ain't giving it up. Voldemort really wants his chair back!

"VOLDEMORT!" Harry Potter burst into the Dark Lords throne room, wand at the ready. He'd finally figured out where the Dark Lord had been hiding, through their connection. Now he was here, ready to end it.

A tumble weed blew across the chamber floor. It was just how he remembered it from the visions. A large room, bereft of any furniture and decorations, save for the single chair made from bones and skulls sitting on the stone dais overlooking the room. Exactly the same. But empty.

"Oh, come _on_!" Harry was exasperated. He stalked across the room, kicking the tumbleweed for good measure, as he ranted about the unfairness of it all. Here he was, in the Dark Lords personal sanctum, ready and willing to go. And the tosser was nowhere to be found. What the hell!

Harry flopped down angrily on Voldemorts bone throne. Maybe he could just wait here for the Dark Lord to return. He could always blast his head off then. Sure, the Death Eaters would then massacre him, but he'd been expecting that when he first walked in. My god this chair was comfortable. It was, perhaps, the most comfortable chair he had ever sat in. As Harry luxuriated in the Laz-E-Boy of Doom, as Voldemort had dubbed his very favorite chair, a plan began to form.

HP

Lord Voldemort strode into his throne room, a smile on his snake like face. It had been a good day. He killed some muggles, tortured some of his followers, and stolen some candy from a baby. Now, he had the rest of the day to himself. Nothing to do but sit in his...

"Where the hell did my throne go!" Voldemort was no longer happy. He rushed to the raised dais only to discover a parchment note where his throne once stood.

_Dear Dork Lord, _

_We have your chair. Call off your rein of terror, or you'll never see it again. We mean it!_

The note was unsigned. The Dark Lord had never been this angry in his life. He would find the chair-nappers, and when he did...

HP

"No, Harry!" Hermione was appalled. "You can not keep that, that, that... thing, here!"

"But 'Mione..."

"Don't you 'Mione me! You simply cannot keep a throne made out of bones in the common room." She sniffed. "Where did you get that dreadful thing anyway?"

"Stole it from the Dark Tosser." Harry said nonchalantly. "It's the most comfortable chair I've ever sat in."

"I don't care if it... THE DARK LORD!" Hermione was horrified. "You stole the Dark Lords throne!"

"Bloody Brilliant, mate!" Ron piped up from the corner of the room, where he was demolishing Nevile Longbottom in a game of chess.

"Language Ron." Hermione tossed out, purely on reflex. "Harry, explain." One convoluted, unlikely, and somewhat contrived sounding explanation later, "Oh, I suppose that makes sense then." Hermione said.

"I thought so." Harry nodded sagely. "Anyway, back to the matter at hand. By the fire you think, so I can watch the flames and keep warm?"

"No, Harry. You still can't keep the Dark Lords throne in the common room." Hermione was exasperated. "You should take it to the Headmaster."

"You need to sit in the chair." Harry intoned confidently.

"I most certainly do not!"

"Oh, yes." he dragged the word out in a hiss.

"No, Harry."

"Yes." and with that Harry scooped up Hermione.

"Harry!" Hermione shouted, fighting the instant blush, "Put me down this instant!"

"Your wish is my command." Harry smiled, dropping her into the chair.

"Harry! I can't believe you just... wow!" Hermione wriggled around in the chair for a moment. "This thing really _is_ comfortable."

"See!" Harry said victoriously.

HP

"I need to know everything there is to know about Potters friends, Lucius." the Dark Lord hissed menacingly. This new chair, while looking like is old one, was not nearly as comfortable. He shifted restlessly. "He has something... preciouses... to me. I will have revenge. Everything he cares for will burn and die before him."

"At once my lord." Lucius bowed lower, kissed the hem of the Dark Lords robes, and backed out of the throne room.

Yes, the boy would pay, and pay dearly. Voldemort shifted again. Merlin he missed his chair.

HP

Dumbledore smiled in his grandfatherly way, eyes twinkling as he gazed upon his student. Sitting across from him was one Harry Potter. Harry was slightly nervous as he sat in his comfy new chair. What if the headmaster disapproved of his bone throne? What if he demanded he be rid of it? Harry didn't think he could do that!

"My boy, that's quite a chair you have their." Dumbledore smiled. "But perhaps a throne made from the bones of your enemies does not send the right message of being a light wizard." he once more checked the enchantments on the chair through his enchanted spectacles. Yes, a chair that comfy must be his... for the greater good! "Still, I wouldn't deprive you of your justly earned rewards. Therefore..." he paused dramatically, "I offer you a trade!"

With a wave of his wand, another chair became disillusioned. It was roughly the same size, but overstuffed and comfortable looking. And it was seemingly made out of lemon drops. Harry sweatdropped.

"Um... thanks, professor, but I think I'll stick with this one. Thanks."

"But Harry, how will light wizards think of you, when you sit in a chair made from the bones of your enemies?" Dumbledore tried.

"It's not the bones of my enemies headmaster. I took the chair from Voldemort, so it's the bones of _his_ enemies." He paused, looking thoughtful. "if the enemy of my enemy is my friend, then I suppose that makes them the bones of my friends. Hardly any better. But I didn't know any of the people he used, so how could they actually be my friends?"

Harry turned to one of the skulls on his arm rest. "Hey Ron. How's it hanging?"

"Not too well mate." Harry moved the jaw up and down, talking out the corner of his mouth in a fair impression of his best friend. "I'm just a skull now. No dangly bits."

Harry spun to the skull on the other arm rest. "Oh Harry, did you finish your homework for potions?" he said out the corner of his mouth in a high pitched version of Hermione's voice while moving it's jaw.

"Not yet, Hermione. Don't worry, It's almost done." He looked up at the headmasters mildly horrified face. "Yeah, I don't think that works. I'll see what I can do about the bones, sir." Harry mentally added a _'not'_ to the end of his sentence. Like he would do anything that might change the awesomeness of his new chair!

HP

"We've learned all that we can of the Potter boy's friends, my Lord." Lucius groveled.

"Tell me!" snapped Voldemort. Ever since his throne had been pilfered the Dark Lord had been in a fowl mood. Despite the glamor charm, no matter how many cushioning charms he placed on the impressive looking easy chair he now sat on, it just couldn't equal the Laz-E-Boy of Doom.

"The Weasley family is still a difficult target. The Wards on their home are formidable, and the only time the father is seen outside of the wards is when he's at work in the ministry. The mudblood seems to be the easy target. Minor wards on her home, but her parents have a business with no protections. A 'Granger and Granger Dentistry Clinic'"

"Very well, take a group of deatheaters and... wait, did you say Dentistry?" The Dark Lord remembered his time in the muggle orphanage. He remembered when they were subjected to drills and pliers and assorted tortures at the hands of those muggle dentists.

"Yes my Lord. Shall I take a death squad and remove them?"

"No! Dentists are far to dangerous. They are masters of muggle tortures. The things they do..." Voldemort shuddered. "No. The mudbloods parents are off limits." Perhaps one of his minions within the school could steal back his chair...

HP

"Hey, Mate." Ron asked Harry, who was currently reclining in his throne, reading a Brooms Quarterly. "Can I borrow your invisibility cloak? I'm starved and want to go to the kitchens."

"Oh?" Harry said, reaching down to the side of his chair, under the arm rests. He pulled one of the bones, and a hidden compartment opened with a burst of cold air. He reached in and pulled out a butterbeer and a slice of mint chocolate cake. "Here ya go, Ron."

"Bloody hell! That's brilliant!" Ron shouted.

"I know." Harry smirked.

HP

"Mr. Potter," Dumbledore had harry in his office again, "perhaps you would trade for this chair!" Dumbledore said triumphantly. Once again he flicked his wand, disillusioning a new chair. This one was seemingly carved of gold, the Griffendor lion prominently featured.

"That is a rather nice chair." Harry eyed the gaudy monstrosity. Were those actual rubies for the lions eyes? "But I think I'll stick with what I have."

"Ah," Dumbledore sat in the gold chair, "but can your chair do this?" with that the chair actually got up and started walking around the room. "I noticed you had to have your chair moved to your classes by the house elves. With this chair, it won't be a problem!"

"Actually, sir, Hermione found out my chair could do this." And his chairs legs, made from the skeletons of snakes, began moving. Soon, his chair was slithering about, faster, and with a far smoother ride than Dumbledore's lion throne.

"Bugger." Dumbledore acknowledged his defeat.


End file.
